Paronomasias
Ah, the start of a new month, time for our From the Road feature. Since the first of April is known the world over as a day of jokes, pranks, and hoaxes we’ve put together a sampling of paronomasias (Lance shares his father’s affinity with puns). You know, puns. Aw come on, puns aren’t that bad—Shakespeare used hundreds of them in his works and some folks think he was a great writer.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
Three of my fingers are willing, but my thumb and forefinger are opposed.
A lot of money is tainted. ‘Taint yours and ‘taint mine.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
Someone who jumped off a Paris bridge is in Seine.
Pasteurize: Too far to see.
There’s a new program on TV about origami. It’s on pa-per view.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
A boy swallowed some coins and was taken to the hospital. When his mother asked about his condition, the nurse said ‘No change yet’.
What did the fish say when he hit the concrete wall? “Damn.”
What do you call Santa’s helpers? Subordinate Clauses.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.
What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.
A broken pencil is pointless.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack. One hat said to the other, “You stay here, I’ll go on a head.”
A man entered ten different puns in a contest. He hoped that at least one of them would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
What is “From the Road?” It's where we share a tidbit—be it a quote, a photo, or some other oddity—that we encountered during our travels. Enjoy!
I was going to start an Apathy Anonymous group, but why bother.
Nice addition to the list, Leah!
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack. One hat said to the other, “You stay here, I’ll go on a head.”
The way I heard this, it was What did the hat say to the tie? “You hang around here, I’ll go on a head.”
On a par with What did one wall say to the other wall? “I’ll meet you at the corner.”
It’s nice to read about people on the road. I spent many years living in a van through all 48 states; now I’m mostly stuck these days as a guide in Acadia National Park. (On a whale watching boat, although not the one that chases the puffins.)
p.s. Nice job finding Gringo’s in Bar Harbor. That’s really one of the places where the locals eat, and the owner is a great guy.
I like your version of the hat pun, RPS. As with most of these I think there countless versions, only limited by one’s imagination.
How cool that you traveled the states – all the times I’ve been across country and I still haven’t seen everything… Its a great experience that we highly recommend.
I think guiding in Acadia would be amazing. Such a gorgeous place and the sea life – astounding.
Mmmm, thanks for reminding me, we have fond memories of the burritos and smoothies at Gringo’s!